Meeting our kid's needs

Whenever I think of parenting as a whole, I think of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs.

According to Maslow, human needs were arranged in a hierarchy, with physiological (survival) needs at the bottom and the more creative and ‘self-actualization’ needs at the top.

Maslow argued that each lower need must be satisfied before the individual can satisfy the higher needs.

It can also be argued that as each need is met, reaching the next stage or phase becomes inevitably harder due to external and internal barriers that challenge us to achieve higher goals.

As parents, our #1 job is to meet our kids' basic needs.

We give them 3 square meals, a roof over their head and tuck them in at night so they feel safe.

Some kids, however, while they might have a home and some food in the house or at school, may not receive the ideal level of love and intimacy (affection) at home.

This creates a level of stagnation that makes it almost impossible for them to achieve a self-esteem of confidence or self-worth.

I often talk about helping our kids believe and reach a level of understanding of their highest sense of self.

That highest sense of self is where they experience their potential, create, problem-solve, and look outwardly, as opposed to analyzing themselves inwardly.

Most adults have not been able to get to that point yet.

If you look at most issues people struggle with, you can probably look at that pyramid diagram and see where a need has not been met in their life.

Even when it comes to nutrition.

Sure, we can feed our kids until they're stuffed, but if that food doesn’t contain the nutrients meant for the body to thrive…

Are we optimizing that baseline need to help them further acend up the chart?

This whole idea gets trickier as they get older, go to school, and are exposed to new friends and influences.

When they are very young, we have more control over developing their basic and psychological needs…

However, as they become social creatures, external forces challenge their relationships, friendships, beliefs, and feelings of belonging.

When a child feels as though they “don’t belong”, their self-esteem is challenged.

Which keeps them from “knowing” their highest sense of self.

So, how do we keep them on that ascended path upward?

How do we help them work through those inevitable challenges they will face within each phase?

Although I’d love to be “the guru” and give you the exact answer…

But that would make me a liar.

I think just using Maslow’s idea of human behavior and psychology and being aware is a great start!

Sure, we all want our kids to accomplish things.

But there’s a big difference between feeling accomplished and accomplishing.

Just like there’s a big difference between feeling full from eating and fueling your body.

Another perspective to keep in mind is whether we are always trying to meet their needs or are we also giving them the tools to learn how to meet their own needs.

Fuel their bodies with nutrients.

Give them water.

Keep them safe, but also, YOU BE the safe space.

Show them healthy relationships.

Lots of hugs.

Celebrate little wins.

Celebrate the journey and the hard work more than the actual accomplishment.

Remind them that they are always stronger, smarter, and better than they currently think they are.

In your corner,

Greg

P.S. I’m excited about a new vision and focus that I can wait to release. Okay, I’ll give you a hint: It’s a super low-cost (like under $10) monthly membership that I’m developing. It’s going to include one health lesson and activity challenge and one personal growth activity challenge per month. It’s also going to include an easy-to-follow program for parents to follow so they can show their kids what it means to be their highest selves.

FAVOR: What is one thing you would love to see in the program?

Your feedback is crucial!